Nigerian Men : Always the Victim

As a Nigerian who has been alive for a while i think it's safe for me to say Nigerian Men love playing the victim and the context in which i speak is in marriages and relationships .  If the title offends you good I've got your attention .


A person harmed,injured or killed as a result of a crime , accident , or other event or action
  • A person who is tricked or duped
  • A living creature killed as a religious sacrifice 

Now that we understand who a victim is i will pose a situation , A Nigerian Man who cheats ,beats or rapes a woman and then when confronted says the woman made him do it is essentially playing the victim because in his eyes he is innocent free of blame. Now i say how can someone trick or dupe you into cheating and how can you be the victim and the perpetrator/ victimizer  at the same time in simpler terms you cannot be a victim and the problem at the same time. Many Nigerian Men claim wild reasons for maltreating their spouses and girlfriends ranging from she doesn't cook , she's lazy , she's terrible in bed etc , they always have something to say yet i wonder is that enough reason for you to be irresponsible .
          How can you shift all the blame to the woman when you are the one instigating the problems in your relationship . It has been said a million times that if a man complains about everything you do he's just looking for a way out and how i interpreted this saying is that if a man gives excuses for his actions then he is not a man but a loser and a coward . A strong man builds not tears down , he supports his wife and resolves the issues in the home . Nigerian Men have a habit of pushing blame on women and i blame the Nigerian culture and religion that enables them. Every bad thing a Nigerian Man does is a woman's fault and everything good a man does is by this strength . Women get sacrificed and killed just so a man can keep his fragile ego intact. Demanding for better treatment and our rights in the Nigerian society means you are stubborn, rebellious , too modern , aggressive you name it women are labelled so many horrible names just because we refuse to be slaves anymore , we refuse to suffer for a man who will kill you and say you made him do it .

My message to Nigerian Women

Nigerian women please know you deserve better treatment if you have any doubts you are being treated unfairly then you most likely are . Being with a man should bring you peace , love , joy and progress but if you have nothing to show but pain and heartbreak you need to evaluate your situation . My question to you is who do you love more yourself or a man ??? Loving yourself means putting your needs first before any man or child , it is not selfish to love yourself it is bravery . When you value yourself you will know God did not place you on earth to suffer when will you start doing things that make you happy . I am not saying don't love a man or child i'm saying what is the order of priority in your heart . In my case i love myself , family then a man . It is my joy to see my fellow Nigerian women flourish and prosper in life , don't be afraid to be selfish .

My titles are to grab your attention don't take it literally . This blog is not for the easily offended because i hold nothing back . These are my opinions and thoughts and should be treated as such. Lastly keep an open mind when reading my intention is not to insult anybody but to get you thinking. 

Stay tuned for my next post i which will be Nigerian men are lazy


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